


Team Riptide

by Goldenwolfmidna



Category: Splatoon
Genre: Agent Three Has A Bad Family, And like, Bilingual Character(s), F/F, I promise, also yeah hi ive been dead, and that's how Charger Girl came into existence, and then there's eight whos like "i have a brush", and they're like "we need a fourth member", filler chapters that are just. pure fluff because i want to write some, four is a buff dymano user, so four drags three and eight into a league team, there'll be character development, there'll be more to this than just me writing out turf wars, three's like "it's legal if nobody finds out", three's nonbinary, we'll see how often i update this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:40:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27979737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Goldenwolfmidna/pseuds/Goldenwolfmidna
Summary: Four (somehow) manages to convince Three and Eight to join a League team. This can only go well.--also known as: all of my agents are dumbasses and then there's this randomass girl who's like "dude why are you all so good the fuck-"---updates wednesdays! probably!
Relationships: Agent 3/Agent 8 (Splatoon)
Comments: 41
Kudos: 31





	1. getting the band together | 3 pov

**Author's Note:**

> hi yes i have been dead. i want to try to keep a fic going for a long time, so you may not all get super elaborate chapters or a consistent update schedule but i want to try to just. write a lot more than i have been. also, i'll end up drawing the team eventually so yall have an image.  
> \- yes i always like to write in 1st person present tense  
> \- this was an idea i had at like. 3am  
> \- this is all 100% canon in my universe

**■Webmaster■ > Agent 4 has joined the chatroom**

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Hey

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Hey 8 and 3

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** what

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Meet in the Square in half an hour

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Bring Eight

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** why. whatre you planning 4

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** You’ll see. If you come we’ll get waffles at that place you really like

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** seafresh cafe? count me in. 8ll come too, crime she hasn’t had their waffles

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Sounds good! Thanks, Three~

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** yep yep

\--

I put down the phone, turning to my roommate who’s watching me with a confused look. With a sharp smile, I quickly motion for her to get dressed. The octoling- Agent 8 of the New Squidbeak Splatoon- nods and hurries off. I take a second to breathe and then walk upstairs to my room, getting dressed quickly.

Looking at myself in the mirror, it’s weird. I touch my heavily-scarred left tentacle, tracing one of the large cuts. My hand drifts to the large, bluish stain across my right eye and ear, and well onto the tentacle. A reminder of the fight with Tartar- the thing Eight saved me from. I smile in appreciation thinking about the octoling, and then shake my head. We need to go meet Four, she said it’s important. Or at least. She offered me waffles, and she knows my weakness.

I scurry downstairs, where Eight’s already ready to go. I hold up a hand in a pause, bringing out my phone again. 

\--

**■Webmaster■ > Agent 3 has joined the chatroom**

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** do we need to bring anything 4

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** like weapons

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Oh! Yeah, if you guys could bring your mains, that’d be awesome~

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** mkay

**Agent 8 [she/they] > ** What are “mains”? What am I missing here?

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Main weapons! The one you’re the best with and use the most!

**Agent 8 [she/they] > ** Oh! Alright! Thank you, Four.

\--

“Can I borrow your octobrush, Three?” Eight looks up at me, pockting her phone. I give a quick nod, and the both of us walk to my (very large) closet, with all of my weapons arranged. I grab my Totally-Not-Illegally-Modified-Nope-Still-Super-Legal-For-Turf-And-League-Games Heroshot from its shelf, and Eight picks up the octobrush we’ve modded a bit from a wall.

Clipping the gun to an inktank, I shove the tank (and gun) into a large sports bag. Eight tosses her gear into the bag, and I pick it up and sling it across my back. I’ll do the carrying until we get to the Square.

We walk out of my relatively small house, me locking the door quickly. The octoling and I run at a full sprint to the subway station, catching the train to Inkopolis proper. We sit down, and Eight speaks. “What do you think Four is planning, Three?”

I think for a moment before taking my hands to sign- speaking is a thing I Do Not Do. “ _ Well, she’s probably wanting to do some turfing or something. _ ” Eight, knowing Inkling Sign Language, nods before returning to staring out the window- she sees these hills every day we go to Inkopolis, and yet she’s still amazed every time. 

I give a small smile at watching the octoling’s amazement. It makes me happy, what can I say?

The train ride goes by quickly, and as soon as the doors are open, Eight and I dart out, the octoling agent looking to me for directions. I begin walking quickly to a small cafe by the seafront, only a few minutes walk away from Deca Tower. As soon as I begin walking the familiar roads, the smell of the sea comforts me, and soon we’re at the cafe.

Four’s sitting at a table with a view of the outside, and the large roller-user waves at us as soon as she sees us. I give a sigh and walk into the cafe, with Eight following closely. We sit at the table, me raising my eyebrows slightly before signing.

“ _ And what is it you wanted from us? It’s nine in the morning, Four. I want to be asleep right now. _ ” As if to further my point, I flop my hands down onto the table like signing that took a lot more effort than it did. Eight laughs a little as Four looks mock-hurt.

“You’re an agent, Three! You’ve woken up earlier than this!” The inkling says loudly- like it isn’t nine in the morning.

“ _ And I hate it every time. Now, why’re we here. _ ”

“Well, I’m glad you asked. Firstly, I ordered you and Eight some of those waffles you’re addicted to-” she cuts off my argument with a raise of her eyebrows- “as well as some coffee. And I’m here to ask you guys to join a League Team! That I’m making! It’ll be a Super Fun Agent Bonding Activity!”

Eight speaks for the first time since entering the cafe. “That sounds… more fun than what I was expecting. I’ll join.”

Four looks beyond delighted, and now the pressure’s all on me. I want to say no, but the way Eight’s looking at me, I don’t think I have the heart to do it. “ _...fine. _ ”

Agent 4 looks at me with such appreciation as she begins saying something, only to be cut off as someone delivers our food- Four did, indeed, order a lot of waffles. And coffee. At least I’ll be awake for a while yet.

Everyone but me mutters a quick “thank you” and I sign it before starting to eat the waffles, which are gone in only a few minutes. Four takes a break from her eating only to look at me in awe. “For such a tiny inkling, how do you eat that fast?” I don’t think she expects an answer, so I don’t provide one, instead waiting for the other two to finish their food.

They do- eventually- and then I ask an important question. “ _ So. Who’s the fourth member of the team? _ ”

Four raises a hand as if to make a point, but then slowly lowers it. “I… don’t know. I thought we’d pull a NSS-style ‘pull someone off the street and ask ‘em to join us’ type thing.”

“You- what?” Eight looks impressed at how low that is, and both me and Four shrug simultaneously. 

“It’s what happened to me and Three. We saw some random squid on a grate and followed them, and then were told that we’re now agents 3 and 4 of the NSS.” I nod- it’s what happened. Eight just sort of sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose for a moment.

“We’ll look in the news for someone looking for a team.” As luck would have it, a newspaper isn’t a hard thing to find, Eight picking one up from the front of the store and quickly finding an ad for someone looking for a team.

Showing me and Four the paper, it’s clear that this is a vampire inkling, named Ivy. She’s apparently an E-liter 4k main, and according to the ad she’s not bad with it.

“So. Thoughts?” Four asks after a moment. I nod- she seems fine, but she’d have to get along with us.

“I think she’ll be okay.” Eight voices, and to that Four smiles triumphantly.

“And so it’s decided. I’ll call her and ask her to meet us in front of Deca to see how she plays?” Four asks. I nod- I don’t do calls, thanks to not talking, and Eight gets anxious if she needs to call someone.

The large agent gives a nod, dialing a number into her phone and having a quick conversation with the person on the other side. Me and Eight just sort of look at each other, waiting for the conversation to end. Once it does, Four gives a smile. “She’ll be there in about ten minutes. And so we have to be there in five. Finish your coffee, Three, and I’ll go pay.”

I start to sign in protest, but Four pointedly ignores me, paying the cashier with her League ID card. I roll my eyes, drinking the rest of the coffee before standing up to leave, taking the large bag on a shoulder with minimal effort. No, I did not struggle at all to pick it up.

Outside the small cafe, I notice Four without her Kensa dynamo- she must have already rented a locker at Deca- and how she’s waiting for me. I give a glare before following behind her and Eight as we walk to the large tower.

Once we’re there, we only have to wait a minute before a blue-haired vampire inkling darts out of the building, an E-liter 4k hastily sling over a shoulder and seeming to look around for someone. She looks like the squid in the picture, and Four steps up to greet her.

“Um, hi. I’m Ava, the person who called about League?” The colossal squid says, waving a hand awkwardly. “You’re Ivy?”

The smaller squid (still unfortunately taller than me) nods, looking up at Four. “Yep, that’s me. This the rest of your team?” She looks me and Eight over, seemingly unimpressed. Lowering her voice a bit, she turns whispers to Four, “and you’re sure they’re up to it?”

Four laughs. “They’re a lot more competent than you think, I promise. This is Three-” I nod in acknowledgement- “and this is Eight. Or Xavian? What d’you prefer, Eight?”

The octoling, put on the spot, stutters for a bit before finding words. “Eight is fine, thank you.” Ivy nods.

“So, y’all have numbers as your name? Or like, are they code-names.”

“ _ I legally changed my name to Three. _ ” I offer, not expecting to be understood and am rather surprised when the vampire inkling laughs.

“Okay then. Fair enough, I guess. So, y’all are going to watch me do a match, and then after that we’re doin’ one together?”

“Yep!” Ava smiles. “Wait, Eight- you have a League ID, right?”

The octoling nods. “Yes, me and Three got one for me a while ago! Thank you for asking, though.” And with that, we’re off. The agents to the stands while Charger Girl darts into the building, registering for another game. We superjump off- me, Four, and Eight to the stands of Arrowana Mall and Ivy to the spawn pad of the Blue team.

\--

The game starts abruptly, and as soon as it does Ivy’s charging. We’re doing Rainmaker, and while the rest of the team leaps down, heading for the goal of the Rainmaker bubble, Ivy’s skirting around the edges, making paths to her sniping ledges. 

The Pink team’s already all at the bubble, hitting it with everything they’ve got. And then, one of them’s splatted, Ivy looking proud of herself as she readies her charger for another shot. Unfortunately for her, the other team’s now aware of the sniper and is moving around in an attempt to make them harder to hit. A member of Pink’s splatted by a duelies-user, and the bubble’s popped, a third member of Pink going down as the splatling user grabs the rainmaker.

Ivy hops off her platform to the rest of her team, standing on the raised portion of the middle area to get a vantage point. The fourth member of Pink goes down, taking Blue’s roller with them. The rest of the team, however, is pushing for the goal- Ivy’s cleared a nice path to the edge, though now Pink’s respawning.

The rainmaker-carrier hops into the ink, with duelies covering them as Ivy keeps her charger’s charge full, ready to splat the next person who shows themselves. It happens to be Pink’s shooter, splatted before they have the chance to do anything. As the vampire inkling’s charging, the Rainmaker makes a final push, barely landing the fish-like weapon on the edge of the platform before the game is called.

\--

“That. Was. AWESOME!” Four yells as soon as we see Ivy walk out. The charger main gives a shrug.

“It was alright. Now, let’s see what you guys can do.” A confident smile’s on her face- if I’m reading it right, she thinks she’s far better than the rest of us. We’ll see.

Me and Eight rent a locker for our weapons, heading into the room before the next game. I put on my ink tank before Four asks an important question. “What’s our color?”

The answers are instant- orange from me, magenta from Eight, and blue from Ivy. Four sighs before taking a second to resolve this. “...how about we- not green-blue, um. Gold?” That sounds like a reasonable idea to everyone, and we all change our colors to the metallic color used by Team Chaos in the Finalfest.

We’re given a minute head’s up- we have a game. I shove the bag into the locker as Eight picks up her inkbrush and puts the ink tank on, careful to not press it into the inkscars she has from her time in the Metro.

I take a breath in as we superjump to Camp Triggerfish. I see the bubble with the rainmaker in it on the center platform, and we’re given a thirty seconds' heads up until the game starts. We all wait until the whistle blows.

\--

I’m off instantly, hopping off the platform with a practiced ease as I charge ahead of everyone else. Thanks to this being Not A Replica, it’s by far the most powerful weapon here thanks to the fire rate. I’ve covered most of the first platform in my attempt to dart to the middle.

I’m switching between my normal and squid form rapidly, diving into my ink when it’s convenient and then back to humanoid form rapidly. I know Eight’s coming up next to me with her inkbrush- she’ll probably be the one to hold the rainmaker- and that Four’s in the ink next to me. Ivy, I have no idea, but she’s probably found a vantage point.

We’re at the bubble, and I’m shooting at it. Eight and Four pop out of the ink, attacking it with me as it explodes, taking a few members of the Green team with it. As expected, Eight takes the weapon, her brush dissolving into the ink. I gesture for her to follow me as I clear out the path to he left.

Unfortunately, it’s not all clear. A duelies-user rolls out from behind a box, shooting at Eight. With almost no hesitation, I’ve rolled out of the way and flipped up next to the guy, who’s splatted almost instantly. Eight nods in thanks and Four charges ahead, taking out someone else with a well-timed swing from her dynamo.

A shot from a charger startles me as it strikes a path to the rainmaker’s podium. I hop up onto the mesh platform, dodging shots from a splattershot-user and after a few moments, a rainmaker blast takes them out. I smile, hopping onto the wooden platform and painting it gold, revealing the opposing team’s charger. Before the poor guy can react, he’s struck with an E-liter shot and explodes into gold ink, leaving a path for Eight to plop the rainmaker on the podium.

Game’s called, and we all superjump back to the tower to tally scores. I have most turf painted- no big surprise- and Eight’s clearly the hero of the game, as she wielded the rainmaker. Surprisingly, though, Ivy got the most splats- four, which although not many, was plenty for how short that game was. The cash is loaded onto out cards, and Ivy raises her eyes in an impressed gesture.

“Guess I underestimated the short inkling as well as your friend here.” She gestures to me and Eight, to which we both nod. “I’ll join. Y’all seem interesting enough.”

Four smiles a little before adding her to the group chat.


	2. nightmares | 8 pov

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eight has some... less then awesome nightmares about her past. Three does their best to comfort Eight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> less of the Team but more of a thing between Three and Eight because I love them both and also Eight Needs To Be Characterized Because I Don't Do That Enough  
> \-----  
> League cards for them all? Check them out here~  
> [Link to league cards here](https://imgur.com/a/olce4c0)

I’m in the dark. It’s freezing, and I really wish I was wearing more than just my hero suit. Why Callie and Marie made it so thin is beyond me. After a moment, my eyes adjust to the darkness, letting me see the distinct bags full of sanitized ink.

_Just another mission- why’d I let Marie rope me into this?_ I think, irritated. I flick on the hero headset on my ears, but nobody seems to be talking. Just crackling static fills my ears. Figures. I adjust my grip on the herobrush I forgot I was holding before delving deeper into the maze of the Metro.

As I walk, I recognise the tunnels. Vaguely. This wasn;t the testing section, I know that- this was very clearly the employee levels- where Agent Three was kept for… cod, months. The poor inkling was forced to work up here for months, hiding from the sanitized octolings so they wouldn’t become part of the sanitized ink.

I keep walking, my grip on the brush tightening. I hate it here- it’s so unsettling. Memories begin to flash through my eyes for moments- my time at J03: Girl Power is a recurring one. Just looking into the eyes of the octolings as they splatted me, the feeling of the ink eating away at me- the feeling of losing all that made me _me_ as the ink burned me.

_Is that what Three felt when they were under the control of Tartar? The feeling of having the parts of them that make them Three torn away as the Commander took over them? Or were they aware of what was happening and just powerless to resist- like watching yourself in a dream, where you have no control and you just watch what you’re doing?_

I shake the thoughts from my head as I continue down the dark, long hallway. I don’t need to be thinking about how aware my roommate was when they were trying to kill me. I mean- the second time. Third. The first two times, it was because I was controlled by Octavio. Or- well- it was of my own free will, I guess, but I’d been effectively brainwashed!

_That’s a lie- you did what you did because he told you to. Because you wanted to. You wanted to rid the world of the great Agent Three, be a hero to the people who’d abused you all your life._ The voice in my head is right and I know it, but that doesn’t make the words sting any less. _You wanted to kill the only person who did something when you were about to die. And the person who you just_ happen _to love. Isn’t that great._

I’ve stopped. I have a need to break through the floor here- why, I have no idea. I just _do_ \- it’s an impulse I can’t resist, and I don’t know why. And so I do, the floor shattering with ease.

I drop onto a strange sight- Three’s knocked out on the floor with the remains of the blender- and the telephone. I narrow my eyes in dislike as I kick the phone away from the agent, gently picking them up and reaching for my old CQ-80 to call C.Q. Cumber to bring the train.

Within a minute the cucumber’s brought the train back to the Main Station, looking at me in confusion. “Why, hello, Miss Eight. And your friend. Welcome aboard. You know how to select your station.” And with that he’s gone back out, and I’m sitting on the train with an unconscious agent Three.

They’re cute like this. Sort of. It’s strange to see them so relaxed and at ease. Even when they’re asleep, Three seems to be tense. But now, with their head resting in my lap and sleeping, it’s a strange sense of peace.

Right- we need to do some more cleanup. I pick a station at random- J03: Girl Power- my least favorite, but may as well do it now- and select it on the CQ-80. The train begins moving towards there, but for now, I figure I have nothing to do but wait.

My thoughts keep drifting to the agent asleep in my lap. I want this, in a more casual setting- if we weren’t in the Metro right now, this’d be lovely. I’d be delighted, really, to be close to Three. But we are in the Metro and I’m trying to do cleanup and help the citizens of the Metro City by deactivating all the test chambers.

Finally, after what feels like forever, the train screeches to a stop outside of J03. I take a breath before walking out to the platform, carrying Agent Three with me to make sure they don’t get separated from me. Placing them gently against the wall, I tighten my grip on my rematerialised brush and take a card out of my pocket, swiping it in the slot.

The gate lets me through, and I hop out onto the station proper. Canned weapons greet me, but I ignore them in favor of my Herobrush. Taking a breath, remembering this place. The countless times the orb exploded, the times the sanitised octarians splatted me- it hurts even now, thinking about it.

“You can do this.” I say it to myself, the air around me. I hop off the platform into the arena, where there’s strangely enough, no clock. No octolings greet me, but the sound of a superjump echoes in the air. I look around for who jumped, but see no one. Odd.

I begin prying apart the station, searching for a hallway to the back room when the faith crackling static turns into Marie’s voice. “We’re done with the stations, Eight. Could you do the spinal phase? We’re picking up some readings there.”

“Yes, I can. I have Agent Three with me as well.” I respond, superjumping back up to the platform and the weapon-pad thing. Three’s still there, very unconscious. I pick them up and go back to the train, turning us back to the Central Station.

Once we’re there, I begin to walk up to the phase using the walkways we found- Three’s not in squid form, so they can’t jump. But I wish they were- they’re heavier than they think. And there’s a lot of stairs to get back up to the spinal phase.

We get there eventually, and I hop onto the inkrail, balancing with a practiced manner on it as I carry the agent to the elevator, gently placing them on the ground as the elevator rises. I sit then, gently touching Three’s hand. To my relief, they move it a bit as they stir from sleep. Their eyes remain closed, though, which isn’t good.

“Agent Three! Are you okay?” I ask, eyes wide with worry. The agent makes a noise that sounds like agreement, as well as nodding softly. They gently move a hand to their head, rubbing it as I offer a hand to help them stand.

They take it, and finally open their eyes. Instead of the normal teal color (in the left one, the right one’s the color of sanitized ink always) it’s the swirling blue-green of sanitation ink, with the sclera black. The eyes fixate on me, and with a smooth motion take the heroshot from their ink tank and aims it at me, leaving only a second to react.

I duck, rolling away from the inkling. “Three? What happened-” I speak now into my headphones. “Marie! Three’s been sanitized, and I don’t know how to help them. It’s nothing like last time!”

The voice that answers isn’t Marie’s. The robotic monotone is recognisable instantly. “And now you see, my test subject. You were never meant to escape- why should you live when so many others have died?”

I feel that deep in my hearts. I’ve thought that so many times- so many it’s not funny. “At least I’m protecting them from you.” I know it’s a weak argument, but I don’t know what to do. It’s a question I’ve never been able to answer.

Three superjumps onto the crate I’m hiding behind, staring at me with cold eyes. “Why should someone who betrayed their king get to leave?” I don’t know what Three’s voice sounds like, but this isn’t it. This is DJ Octavio. “Why should a little coward get to leave when they’re ruining the lives of their people- when mothers have to tell children the war hero Xavian has gone rogue, and that she’s no longer a friend?”

It hits me again- so much guilt for what I’ve done in the past. For the people I can’t help- the people I've hurt. The people in the Metro who think I’m dead- why do I deserve to live?

I curl up, knowing full well that’s hurting me more than anything. But I don’t care- they’re right, I don’t deserve to be the one to have gotten out of here alive. What makes me so special? I’m perfectly average for an octoling, all I have going for me is luck.

A sharp pain flares in my back as Three hits my sanitized inkscar, and my vision goes black. I feel myself fall to the floor before exploding into a pile of sanitized ink, a burning feeling everywhere.

\----

I wake up gasping, sitting up in the bed instantly to make sure I’m not in the Metro. Nope- just in a room in Three’s house. I’m safe. I feel my heartbeats slowly return to normal as I sit up in the dark. It’s okay. I’m safe.

I walk out into the hall, knocking on Three’s door before walking in. They’re awake, clearly have been for a bit. “ _Sup?_ ” Three signs, glancing up at me. “ _You good?_ ”

I make a noise of disagreement. “I had another nightmare about the Metro. I did not want to be alone.” It feels pathetic saying that. Three already knows this happens- that I can’t leave the damn underground facility alone in my mind- but it’s still a thing I hate. “Can I stay in here with you for a bit?”

Three nods. “ _D’you want to try to get some sleep? Or just stay in here and like… watch shitty movies?_ ”

I snort a little at the second option. Three’s go-to whenever someone’s agitated is the aggressively heterosexual movies they play around Squidmas, or really bad horror movies. Right now, the former would be easier to find, probably, considering it’s December. “Shitty movies sounds lovely, Three. Thank you.” I finally walk into the room properly, closing the door before sitting on the bed. Three brings their laptop over, sitting next to me.

They frown for a moment, then look at me inquisitively. “ _Which one- these two are what we’re looking for, I think._ ” The orange-haired inkling gestures at the screen, where there are two movie titles. I shrug.

“The first, I suppose?” I give as an answer, and the inkling gives a smug grin as they click on it. The intro starts rolling, breaking the silence of the building in the early morning. Three has amazing taste in movies- they know which ones are going to be really bad, and their skill still hasn’t failed. This looks awful already, and we’re a minute in.

“Thank you, Three.” I say after a moment. “For letting me stay in here- and with you in general. It’s… really nice.” I think I can see them blush a bit, but in the lighting I can’t really tell.

“ _‘Course. After all, you’re a good friend, Eight. I want to be there for you when you need me- and if that’s at three in the morning because your Kamabo shit, I’m happy to stay here._ ” A moment passes before they add something. “ _D’you want me to go make something? Like- have I introduced you to the wonder that is hot chocolate?_ ”

The word rings a bell. “I think so? Maybe? I would not be opposed to more chocolate.” Three raises their eyebrows.

“ _You have an addiction, I swear. I’ll be back in like five minutes. Or you can come downstairs with me- whatever makes you feel safe._ ” The inkling pauses the movie before getting up, pushing their tentacles behind their shoulders. I follow them downstairs, where they flick on a light before going and pulling a small pot out.

I watch with curiosity as they make this so-called _hot chocolate_. Three very clearly knows what they’re doing, and after only a few minutes they hand me a mug of some warm drink. I take a sip cautiously, and then down half the mug. “I approve of this.” I say, to which Three smiles.

“ _Figures. You’re addicted~_ ” I don’t know how Three nails the sing-song tone with signs, but they manage to capture the tone perfectly.

“I have no idea what you are talking about.” I say flatly. “I think we have a shitty movie to watch- what happened to that?”

Three grins before heading back upstairs with me, where we again sit on their bed and watch the movie. This time, though we have hot chocolate!

I finish the hot chocolate quickly. Three seems greatly amused by this, but after five minutes they’re done with theirs as well. We watch the movie- a great distraction from the metro that’s been haunting my mind. 

Three, after a few more minutes, starts leaning against me. They’ve been awake all night, so it’s natural that they’d be tired. But it can’t help but remind me of what happened in my dream, making me tense a bit.

“ _...You good?_ ” Three looks up at me, worried. I hate it when they look worried.

I give a smile, only a little strained. “I am fine. Don’t worry.” I lie without thought, barely even registering it as a lie. “Do you want to sleep? Should I leave?”

“ _You’re fine. I like having you around- and I know you’re not in a good headspace to be alone._ ” Three signs back, and I nod. I feel guilty that I’m making the inkling stay up, but they’re right- I’m in a bad headspace to be alone.

We continue watching the movie- I do, because Three falls asleep on me at some point. I don’t mind, because this isn’t the sanitized Three from the Metro, it’s the dumbassed idiot who forgets what they’re doing half the time.

Eventually, I manage to fall asleep, after moving the computer to Three’s desk and placing the inkling on the bed in a more comfortable position, laying down next to them. So that’s nice, and my mind is thankfully not giving me the vivid nightmares I’ve gotten accustomed to. It’s strange, but not in a bad way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- octolings are known as "dawn vampires" in inkling society, thanks to their similar appearance to vampire squids. the title of "dawn" came from how many of them wake up before dawn  
> \- i know that DJ Octavio isn't the king of the octolings in canon game lore but shhhhhh he's very clearly an influential figure in their society  
> \- hey you! yes, you! go drink some water! take care of yourself! or i will steal your kneecaps and break your shins!  
> \- eight is a hundred percent addicted to chocolate. like, whenever she needs to go to the store for whatever reason, she also gets chocolate. and then eats it within like. a day  
> \- leave a comment with suggestions? it's always lovely to read through them, and if people comment ideas for what they want to see, i may use those


	3. squidmas | alternating pov

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ivy and Three are the embodiment of "Be gay do crime". Eight and Three celebrate Squidmas.  
> \--  
> Four messages the group chat with "Why are there 500 unread messages?" and Three says "you dont want to know"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!!! Sorry I didn't make a post last week (or until really late today)- the holidays took priority over writing, so enjoy the late Squidmas chapter!

**■Webmaster■ > Agent 3 has joined the chatroom**

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** so

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** hypothetically, if me and ivy were to have taken the “be gay do crime” thing literally

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** would 8 be mad

**Agent 8 [she/they] > ** Would I? Three! Do not be a criminal!!!

**Ivy [she/her] > ** firstoff, wack names yall

**Ivy [she/her] > ** second, i thought we agreed to *not* tell your gf

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** IVY

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** EIGHT IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND

**Ivy [she/her] > ** sure she isnt. Youve been dating her for like 5 years and ive known you two weeks

**Agent 8 [she/they] > ** We are not, to my knowledge, in a relationship

\--

Eight glances around at the walls at the comforting darkness of Three’s house, wondering about that. It’s very clear to her that others think her and Three are more than friends- and not like she’d complain if they were- but Three’s never spoken about it.

“I should tell her.” The octoling tells the darkness in a surge of bravery and courage. “I mean, I would like to, but…”  _ but I’m too scared they’ll hate me _ .

Eight flops down onto the bed, letting out an “ughhhhh” sound. Why couldn’t it just be easy!

\--

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** thats true, eight

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** and id think wed know better than you,  _ ivy _

**Ivy [she/her] > ** okay cool it then Mx Edgelord

**Agent 8 [she/they] > ** So, did you two do arson or something?

**Agent 8 [she/they] > ** I am truthfully very concerned

I **vy [she/her] > ** nope

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** yes

**Ivy [she/her] > ** three help me out here, we didnt do anything illegal

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** you know i dont like lying to 8

**Agent 8 [she/they] > ** You don’t lie to me? That is very appreciated, Three!

\--

Three turns to Ivy with a defeated look as they walk away, tucking their phone in their pocket.  _ “Look, I hate lying to her. She doesn’t deserve it- she’s been through a lot.” _

Ivy shrugs. “You knew she’d react like this when we said that. You wanted a reaction, because- and I quote- ‘I want to impress her somehow’.” She signs along as she says the words, making Three slump over, defeated.

“I think that once you get back, you’ll impress her. Like, you and I just covered a homophobe’s house in ink. Nothing  _ too _ damaging. Just… inconveniencing.” Ivy says after a second, making Three look at her with a disbelief.

_ “She’ll hate me.”  _ They sign with a resigned energy.  _ “I mean, yeah, we didn’t start it- he was getting all uppity about how I couldn’t just talk- ableist asshat- and then when you explained that we were just talking about- and I quote- my “not-girlfriend” he threatened to call the cops on us. But still! She’d be” _ their hands wave around in aimless circles for a second while they search for the sign they want  _ “exhausted. And can you blame her?” _

Ivy scoffs. “Dude- you’re pretty cool.” She reaches a hand for Three’s shoulder, likely a gesture of support. As soon as she touches it, though, Three flinches- barely perceptible, but it’s still there. Ivy instantly retracts her hand, looking embarrassed and concerned. “Cod, I’m sorry-”

_ “Don’t worry about it. Happens.”  _ They shrug.  _ “So, uh, you say giving Eight this for Squidmas” _ they lift a small bag up on their arm  _ “you think she’ll like it?” _

Ivy gives the squid an expression somewhere between flat and disbelief. “She’d love whatever you got her. ‘Specially chocolate, if what you say is any indication.”

Three nods, fidgeting with the paper bag.  _ Eight’ll love it. And maybe, I can tell her how I feel? I mean, maybe? But like- I’m the great Agent Three! I don’t have emotions, according to the octolings, and hell, whatever happened in Kamabo with that sanitized gunk- _

Three walks face-first into the pole, with Ivy snickering a bit before pulling the agent to their feet. “This is where we part ways, I guess. See ya, Three.”

Three nods, signing a quick  _ “goodbye”  _ before hopping onto the subway and out of sight of Ivy.  _ She’s a lot cooler than I thought. We’re… pretty similar. _

Three settles themselves in a seat as they wait for the train to arrive at their small town on the outskirts of Inkopolis.

\--

[POV: Agent 3]

I walk in the house with a tired energy, turning around and closing the door with a slow, sloppy motion. I forget how tiring shopping is- and spending a day with anyone other than Eight. But no, Four insisted on us getting to know each other. And so today I spent time with Ivy, who’s a lot cooler than I realized.

“Hi, Three.” I turn towards the voice with a smile. It’s Eight in her pajamas, looking pleased to see me.

_ “Hi, Eight. I, uh, got you something. For Squidmas. So, tomorrow.” _ I present the bag, then gently place it under the plastic rainbow tree. Eight raises her eyebrows at it, then turns to me.

“Remember this time last year? When you were saying how Squidmas was stupid and no-one liked it?”

I roll my eyes and nod. And then my eyes widen in remembrance as my brain Does Not Like what I remember.  _ “Fuck- day after, I have to go see my- ew- family.” _

“...are they that bad?” Eight asks after a second. I nod, flashing back to last Squidmas. I hate it there, but it’s okay. One day.

_ “Yeah. On another note, got another shitty movie to watch today, if you want to get my computer set up. I’ll make hot chocolate, you addict.” _ I know I’m grinning, but Eight’s expression is priceless. Eyebrows raised, but looking unamused.

“Sure. I trust it’s not super bad?”

_ “ _ Letters to Satan Claus. _ Or I can find- what’s-it-called-  _ Death under Mistletoe _ \- or! Or or or-  _ Silver Trees at First Light _. That’s a good one.” _

Eight looks at me for a second, then shakes her head and goes upstairs to retrieve my computer.

\--

We settle on  _ Death under Mistletoe _ , a story about a poor family- and the king. The poor family, trying to enjoy Squidmas, is asked for their taxes by a guard. They’re convinced to leave for a bit, but the tyrannical king demands the taxes today.

The family, with no other choice, fights back, and one of the children stabs a guard- accidentally, of course. The other guard says that if they let her and her fellow guard in, she’ll get rid of the taxes.

It then cuts to a beautiful, shining box under a tree, and just above it, a bit of mistletoe. Then, the guard’s family, where an injured man approaches the three children, and then dies, a bit of mistletoe above him.

The king, now reunited with his guard- the other one died- sends the guard to go arrest the poor family’s father, where a body was found. However, the guard’s child rusn in and tells her what happened, and is then told to arrest the child, where the guard refuses and is then dragged off to the dungeon.

Then, finally, the murderer is revealed as it mutters- “I can do it better than you ever could”. It was the tree, leaving a sprig of mistletoe on the king’s corpse.

Eight’s plenty confused about the plot, and so am I, but it’s fine. We’re just trying to have a nice time. I then put on Letters to Satan Claus, and we fall asleep while watching it, me resting my head on Eight’s.

\--

Squidmas morning arrives, and there’s Eight, waking up an hour earlier than me. When my heavy eyelids open, she’s in the kitchen, following a recipe for… something. It smells delicious, and I get up off the couch that we may have fallen asleep on to go see.

“Good morning, Three!” Eight chirps. I have never understood how morning people exist- who  _ likes  _ waking up?

_ “Hi.”  _ I sign sloppily, but as soon as I see what she’s making I perk up. Cinnamon rolls, and she’s just finishing them.  _ “That- that looks amazing, Eight.” _

“Here!” She hands me one on a plate, and it’s absolutely delicious. I finish eating it in a minute, and Eight eats hers nearly as fast.

“So, what’s in the bag? And- um- I didn’t really know you had to get people things for Squidmas- I didn’t expect you to- I’m sorry-” Eight curls up a bit subconsciously, and I wrap an arm around her.

_ “It’s okay. I didn’t want anything, really.” You being here is enough. “But, yknow, open it and see. _

Eight catches my hand as I move it back to my side, smiling. “I am keeping this for right now. Hand me the bag?”

I feel a blush spread across my cheeks, but do my best to look impassive as I hand the octoling the bag with my gift in it. 

Eight reaches into it, pulling out what I got her- and releasing my hand, though I’m not sure how I feel about that. A takoyaki with a pin through it, made of gold- or some lookalike. She turns to me, grinning.

“It’s wonderful, Three! Thank you so much!” She’s beaming, and it’s fucking adorable. I feel myself snort a little but in amusement, but it’s wonderful.

_ “Course. You mean a lot to me, wanted to get you something-” _

She cuts me off by wrapping me in a hug, something I don’t even pretend to not want. I practically melt into her arms as she keeps thanking me, and it’s just so sweet.

It’s been half an hour and this is the best Squidmas I’ve ever had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- Ivy speaks Inkling Sign Language due to her deaf younger brother. shes perfectly happy to speak verbally or sign, often doing them both at the same time  
> \- 2 of the 3 movies I listed are ones ive "seen" and "exist"- as in, Death under Mistletoe was what my school's imporv group put on as our longform this year. it was great, it was perfect, i killed a man  
> \- to add to that ^^ letters to satan claus is very real and ive seen 5 minutes of it and need to watch it all now  
> \- three has a shitty family! we'll see how next chapter!  
> \- comment or i will "invert your rib cage and boil your teeth in swamp water", as my friend puts it
> 
> 2020 is almost over!! this year has been a hell of a ride, and I'd like to thank everyone here for taking the time to read this, or write a fic, or anything! yall have brought me a lot of comfort in just reading cute splatoon shit- or she-ra, or dear evan hansen- and writing this fic has been a lovely change of pace from the quarantine life. so, really, thank you all so much for being here, and reading me spilling my emotions at midnight. it's appreciated more than you could ever know, and I can only hope reading this fic is as likable as writing it


	4. storge | 3 pov

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three goes to see their family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's 2021!! small victory, yknow

“You are sure you’ll be okay?” Eight says with a worried tone, catching my arm again as I step outside. Her eyes are wide, and though she hasn’t ever met my family, she’s heard plenty about them for me (and Callie, and Marie). 

I shrug- honestly? I’ll hate every second of it, but I’ll live.  _ “I’ll be fine.”  _ It’s true. As much as I hate being with my family, they’re family, and they won’t hurt me. I live every time.

“Hmph.” Eight releases my arm with a huff. “Please come back if you feel unsafe, or are unhappy, or-”

I nod, cutting her off.  _ “I’ll be fine. Promise.” _ I then, with an almost hesitant motion, leave to the subway station. Taking a breath, I flop down on one of the hard plastic seats, prepared to return to the house I grew up in.

I feel my phone buzz and pull it out. A text from Ava.  **Hey, Three. Know you hate it at your family’s place, so me, Callie, Marie, and the Cap’n are inviting you and Eight over to Cuttlefish Cabin later, for some food and spending time with your other family.**

The sentiment makes me smile as I type a quick response.  **ill be there. thansk 4**

She replies with a thumbs-up, and I set the phone down, anxiously tapping my foot against the hard plastic. After a moment of that, I start to fidget with the hem of my shirt, brushing all the lint off of it that I can see. Mother would hate me having my shirt messy at all-

My  _ hair _ , oh fuck. I quickly fiddle with the tentacles, arranging them in less of a messy fashion. Satisfied with my reflection in the window of the train, I calm down again, only to have another wave of panic brought on by my binder. Could it be seen? No, I wear too many layers for that.

The anxiety stays with me the whole train ride, to the point that as soon as I can, I dart off to look at myself in the mirror of a public restroom. I look fine, thank Cod. A hundred percent presentable.

I take a shaky breath before walking off to the sterile, polished, clean-cut houses of my old street. I can almost feel the unwelcome stares of the people on the streets as I walk down to the looming threat of the house I lived in for however-many years.

I take a breath before knocking.  _ Do I want to do this? I mean, they’re family- I should. _

I knock on the door, letting out the breath. Almost instantly, it’s opened, and  _ she’s _ there. My mother, in all of her scowling glory.

Pale skin, with orange tentacles, in the stereotypical Karen hairstyle. Bright green eyes- like mine- and a scowl on her face. “Kara. You’re late, as always.”

I keep myself from flinching at my old, deadname. Barely. I give a feeble wave as my mother turns on her heel and walks in, with me following behind, hunching over a bit.

“Well?” My mother says, clearly wanting to know why I wasn’t perfectly on time. I reach a hand up to sign, and then stop. She doesn’t understand, she doesn’t know signs.

Instead, I take out a notebook and pen, scrawling on the paper.  **Train was late. Sorry** . I hold it up as answer, but just get a growl in return.

“Don’t be late. Do you really not care about your family that much?” I feel a pang of guilt- they’re family, I love them.

**Won’t happen again** . I scawl, but Mother rolls her eyes before escorting me into the living room, where Father and Eliska are. Father’s watching a Turf match, commentated by Off the Hook, and Eliska is on her phone.

“Kara’s here, everyone.” Mother says with an edge. Eli looks up, narrows her eyes, and then glances back at her phone. Father just gives a “hmph” noise.

“Wish you would visit more often- do you just not love us anymore?” Mother asked, to which I shook my head before starting to sign.

_ “I wish I could- so busy, you know. But you’re family, I love you.” _ I sign, and then stop thanks to my mother gawking at me like I had grown an extra head.

“Speak or use your writing thing. Your hand waving will not be tolerated in this house.” Father glances up before scolding me, and I shrink back a tad before writing.

**I wish I could visit more. I am busy, though.** _ Unlike Eli _ , I add mentally with a glare. Mother gives a huff before turning to Father.

“Did you get the things for dinner?”

Father turns towards us for the first time. His skin- darker than mine- and his eyes are almost black. His tentacles are a pale teal- which makes me think of Kamabo, Coddamn that awful facility- and he’s bored. I fixate my gaze on the octoling-inkling girlfriends commentating the Turf War match on the TV as he answers. “Yeah.”

“Wonderful.” Mother gives a smile like honey trapping flies. “Eliska, how is your turf career going?”

The paler inkling gives a sigh as she looks up from her phone. Ultramarine eyes and dark blue tentacles, put up into a high ponytail. She has a tri-slosher tossed on the floor next to her, and her voice is annoyed. “I got ten splats in my last game, mother.”

_ Ten. That’s almost nothing. _ The voice in my head says with a hiss, though physically I don’t react.  _ I could do 15, easy. _ Mother looks delighted.

“Isn’t that great, Kara?” She says with a pointed edge, almost asking me to say no. I nod in response before she can prompt me again, and though she smiles, the coldness in her eyes betrays her displeasure.

“Well, Kara, will you go prepare us some dinner?” Eli asks with a sharp smile. She knows she has the support, and so with a resigned sigh, I nod.

I head into the kitchen as the other three stay in the living room. I begin washing carrots and potatoes, peeling them with an ease and chopping them up. The potatoes will be mashed potatoes, and I’ll make some carrot soup.

I go through the motions with barely a thought, an hour of this visit wasted already by the time dinner is made.

I set out the plates and the food as the family comes in. They all get seated as I bring everything over with an annoyed gesture, sitting down at the last chair- the creaky, half-broken one.

Mother starts saying a blessing, where I bite my lip and smile through it. As soon as this is over, I’ll go to Cuttlefish Cabin in the Canyon.

Mother dishes up her food, followed by Father. Eli goes next, and although I’d made quite a bit of food, there isn’t much left for me. I still take it and begin eating before my mother gasps.

“I raise you, and this is how you repay me? No respect, I swear.” She says with a dramatic gasp. I look at her inquisitively before I realise my mistake- eating before Mother. I’m amazed no one stabbed my hand with a fork.

_ “I’m sorry.” _ I sign, and they understand- I said it so much they learned. But still, Mother goes on a rant.

“I raise you, I feed you, I clothe you, I push you to be your best, and still no respect. All you do is take, and take, and take, and I can see why you’re so lazy.” She’s pulling her mouth into a sneer as I instinctively curl closer to myself. “You’re careless enough to be unpresentable, dumb enough to get injured. Eli, who does turf professionally, has never gotten injured, but you? Let me guess, you got that disgusting splotch of teal on your face by tripping.”

I’m fine I’m fine  _ I’m fine I’m fine I’m fine  _ **_I’m fine I-_ **

“And to add to it, you can’t even be bothered to be half-useful. You’re living alone, and yet you’re worse than any of us here. You’re so lazy, and fat, and disgusting, aren’t you, Kara? You’re just a little girl, what could we expect from you?”

I exhale sharply, rising from my seat with a glare. Tensing myself, I walk over to my mother, pushing past Eli, who gives a little gasp. I’m three inches shorter than my mother, but that doesn’t stop me from being the most intimidating person in the room- and it’s not even a biased fact.

“Kara, stop that.” Father says with a sharp growl to his tone, rising. I turn towards him, body language clear even to them.  **Are you looking for a fight?**

He starts moving towards me, with intent to force me back into my seat so I can be the obedient little squid they wanted. As soon as he makes a motion, I slap his hand away and force him into an armlock, pushing him to the ground.

Mother gives a little gasp, turning to Eli with frantic eyes in an unspoken plea for help. Eli, however, has the common sense to get out of my way as I march over to my mother, roughly shoving her to the ground with a sense of satisfaction. Strangely enough, my Kamabo scar burns a bit as I lean down to her, signing.  _ “D-O-N-T. B-I-T-C-H.” _ I then turn from her, tossing one more glare over the room as I leave, slamming the door behind me.

I feel so many emotions rise in me as I leave that codforsaken house, marching to the train station, keeping the anger as the dominant emotion- I am Agent Three of the New Squidbeak Splatoon. I will not feel bad until I am alone.

That’s all I think as I sit down on the train with a huff, waiting impatiently to arrive at the Square.

\----

When I arrive, I slip into the grate with barely a thought and am transported to the Canyon. Marie, Callie, and Four are there already, setting up lights around the small piece of land Cuttlefish Cabin is on.

“Hey, Three.” Marie notices me first, dropping her lights to walk over. “You good?”

I give her an inquisitive look before shrugging.  _ “Family sucks.” _

“What she means to say is you look like shit, Three. Eight’s here, d’you want to spend time with your girlfriend?” Four’s head pops out of the cabin with a worried look, hands covered in oven mitts.

I don’t have the will to argue, so I nod and Four mutters something as Marie gives me one more concerned look before going back to her lights. Eight then walks out of the cabin, looking about twenty times more worried than everyone else.

“Hello, Three. Do you want to be somewhere else with less people? I- that helps me when I experience bad things.” I know her memory is going to the Metro, where I’ve heard from Gramps that after a hard station, she’d spend hours in her room, alone.

I give a nod and let her lead me to a platform that, while still safe, is further away from Callie, Marie, and Four. I don’t want them to see me weak like this- hell, I don’t want Eight to see me like this. But I  _ can’t  _ be alone, I know that.

“Do you want to walk about it? Or just stay here?” She asks, gently placing an arm around my shoulders. The emotions I was fighting to control bubble to the surface, spilling out before I can even try to contain them again.

I pull myself into a ball and start sobbing, and I just can’t stop. I hate it so much, I want it to stop, I want to be fine.

Eight pulls me into a hug, and now I’m just crying onto her shoulder. I feel so bad, but there are so many emotions, and I sort of want this-

\---

It’s been half an hour and finally, I feel able to sign- and look people in the face. I lift my head from the octoling’s shoulder. She turns to look at me with such a warmth I couldn’t imagine it. “Do you want to walk about it?”

I shrug weakly before moving my arms out to sign, barely focusing on the words.  _ “I always had to be perfect. I was the youngest, and so I was expected to be the greatest, since I had Eli to live up to. I had to outperform her in school, be better at turf.. it was a lot. Y’know how I was only 14 when I was recruited into the NSS? It was because Mother wanted me to be better. _

_ “I did everything I could to be the best, but it was never good enough. Mother was always disappointed and Father seemed so.. distant with me. Eli was the favorite, and I don’t know what I could have done to change that. And so I gave everything my everything, and it wasn’t good enough. I stopped talking because it felt like I was always talking to nothing, and learned sign instead.” _

I lean my head against Eight’s shoulder again, feeling better. It was… nice to talk to someone about this. Finally, getting it off my chest and into the world.

Eight sighs quietly before speaking, taking time to think before each word. “I… am sorry, Three. That sounds beyond awful.” She pauses for a moment, pulling me closer to her- which, I’m not arguing against. I feel so miserable that this’d be nice with anyone. “Thank you for telling me, though.”

I nod, glancing over at the lights Callie and Marie have finally finished setting up.  _ “We should go back. I feel… a lot better. Thank you” _

Eight nods, standing up and pulling me to my feet. “Do you want me to talk about what happened, or not?”

I shake my head no as we walk back, Eight starting to talk about Four’s amazing cooking. I smile and nod as we walk back.

“Well, welcome back, Three.” Marie says with the usual amount of snark. “How was that date?”

I give a glare at the white-haired inkling who tosses a smug grin before going to finish working at the table they’ve set up. It’s amazing that Four, Callie, Marie, and Gramps would do this. And it was basically just because they know I have a shitty family.

_ “Y’all are amazing.”  _ I sign with a shock. Eight looks delighted, and Four from the cabin gives a thumbs-up out the door. 

“Give me like two minutes- I’m nearly done here!” Four calls. “Cooking is great, but it’s pretty time-consuming! Could one of you get some of this and put it on the table?”

Eight grabs my hand and drags me to the cabin, where Four’s cooking. There’s plates of food on the table, which me and Eight grab and begin transporting it to the table.

Once that’s done, we all sit down at the table, lit mostly by the lights Callie and Marie put up. The Cap’n comes out of the cabin, sitting down and giving a short speech.

“I would just like to say that the NSS has done great things.” Cap’n says, looking over the group of cephalopods with a fondness. “We’ve beat DJ Octavio- twice!- and taken down Kamabo Corp., a terrible facility that kidnapped not only me and Agent Three, but also our dear Agent Eight.”

“Yes Gramps, we know.” Callie remarks with a smile. “We were there- sort of.”

“True, true. Well. I’d like to say it again. You all are wonderful. Now, Agent Four has made us a wonderful meal.” Cap’n trails off before picking up his fork and digging into the meal, with everyone else following.

\--

We get back home late. I close the door with an exhausted sigh before walking up the stairs. Eight follows, heading to her room, and I get changed into pajamas.  _ I’ll take a shower tomorrow,  _ I figure as I flop onto bed.

“Three?” I hear from the doorway. It’s Eight. “Are you doing better from earlier?”

I shrug, flipping over to face the octoling.  _ “I’m better now.” _

“Are you sure?” Eight joins me in sitting on the bed. “You seemed very distraught earlier. Agitated.” 

_ “I was.” _ I turn to face away from Eight with a shame I can’t hide. I wish I could have been fine.

“Do- would it benefit you if I was here tonight?”

I shrug, and then nod. I still feel awful from earlier, and Eight helps. As soon as she sees this, she flops down in bed next to me, and I curl up next to her.

_ “Thank you.”  _ I sign before shutting my eyes.

“Yeah. Of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- 3 has a shit family. i feel so bad  
>  \- they may have to see their family again. i am excited


	5. run | 3 pov

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Four decides Salmon Run is a good teambuilding exercise. The team disagrees.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *screech*  
> hey hey it's me. ya boi. here with another chapter of ~this~  
> got some art for last chapter, link [here](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/711401551343779882/798805481728638996/Confrontation.png)  
> 

“You decided to sign us up for a Salmon Run shift.” Ivy says with an almost-amazement. Sitting outside of Grizzco, it would logically make sense that Four indeed would do that as a teambuilding exercise.

“Yep!” The yellow inkling says with a cheerfulness that I know isn’t faked, but it sounds damn close. “We need to work as a team, and nothing like being chased by a horde of bloodthirsty salmonoids to do that!”

_ “You work part-time at Grizzco, don’t you?”  _ I ask Four, who nods in response.  _ “And Grizz just… let you sign us up for a shift?” _

“Yeah! I mean, I told him I’d just ‘have a team’, nothing else. We’re due for our shift in ten minutes. We’re gonna be working in the Ruins with another team- we’re gonna stay separate, but meet on the boat. That means be civil, Three.” Four tosses a pointed glare my way, and I give an innocent shrug.

_ “I’m always civil. I don’t know what you’re talking about.” _ I sign, extremely composed.  _ “It’s not my fault some inklings can’t handle me calling their skills with a Splattershot Jr ‘about as competent as a mud-snorting Chum on crack’. I can’t control that.” _

“You  _ what _ -” Eight begins, and then cuts herself off. “Nevermind. I do not want to know.”

“Dude, you need to teach me how you come up with these insults!” Ivy looks delighted- as she should. Four, however, just looks exasperated.

“Okay, cool. Three- do  _ not  _ insult people’s skills with weapons where they can see or hear you. Now, let’s get going. We have to be on the boat in two minutes.” Ava says with an air of exasperation.

We get up with minimal bickering and head into the totally-not-shady shop, where the wooden bear radio of Mr. Grizz instructs us which boat is ours. Boat 5, only one there as of now. The other team is there already.

We get onto the boat with a minute to spare, everyone settling down for the ride. Four’s at the bow, having already changed into her work gear. Ivy’s wandering around the boat, and Eight’s very narrowly avoiding a lot of water at the back of the boat. I decide to see the other team who we’re (unfortunately) going to have to work with- around? They’ll do their thing and we’ll do ours.

Walking into the cabin, a chaotic scene is in front of me. A green-haired inkling with his hair in a ponytail is dramatically sighing, falling into the hands of a dark blue, wavy-haired inkling who looks very done with his shit. An octoling with the standard magenta hair, tied up in a topknot, looks delighted, and in the back, what looks to be another inkling with light purple ink, hair drooping over one eye and dripping unevenly the whole way back, is smiling slightly.

Once they see me- a solid five or so seconds- the green one steps forward, leaving the blue one off-balance. “Hello, fellow shipmate! I’m Whit- yes,  _ that _ Whit. The soon-to-be famed actor!”

I nod, only a little confused.  _ “I’m Three.” _

“Signs, huh. Interesting.” Blue-wavy-hair’s now over next to Whit, looking over me, likely to assess how competent I am. Seemingly satisfied, she speaks. “Clara. I’ve got no fancy title- Whit here’s just a dramatic little fuck.”

Whit seems deeply offended by this, placing a hand on his chest and gasping dramatically. “Point in case.” Clara says with affection. “Over there’s Ro-” she gestures at the octoling, who looks up and waves- “and that’s Masque. Yeah, little shit changed his name to that.”

“And I’d do it again!” Masque yells back, tossing Clara a glare.

“Aaaanyways. Pleasure to meet you. Though, really expected a kid on a team of profreshes to look more the part.” Clara says with a certain bluntness that makes me think of someone I knew as a little squid.

_ “I’ll have you know, I could beat you in a fight any day of the week, you little half-wit, swamp-water-gargling salmonid.”  _ I retort, ‘forgetting’ Four’s rule about not insulting people. They were asking for it!

“Can you?” Clara says with an eyebrow raised. I hide my shock that she can understand what I’m saying, but nod with a confident-ness that only Agent Three of the NSS can do. “Great. I’ll take you up on that, smallfry.”

I grin.  _ “I look forward to it already.” _

“Three, are you insulting these people!-” Eight slams the door open, clearly expecting the answer to the question to be a yes. Of course, it is, but that’s irrelevant.

_ “No?” _ I reply with caution.  _ “Anyways I’m going to get changed okay bye-” _

I dart away to one of the changing rooms on the ship, getting into the work uniform with some reluctance. It’s all rubber and very Not Comfortable, but supposedly has salmonid protection built in. 

Thankfully, by the time I’m done changing, we’re at the Ruins of Ark Polaris. Grabbing one of the weapons at random- a Brella of some sort- I superjump to the landing zone, the rest of the team following closely behind.

“Okay, we have a minute before they get here. Get this area inked, and let us know- I repeat, LET US KNOW when you see salmonids. Somewhere on your weapon, you have a signal to let us know your location.” Four instructs us all with a patience I knew she possessed, but had never seen.

“Sounds good!” Eight says with a smile, clutching her slosher a bit tighter and turning to leave, tossing ink everywhere. I follow suit, the trigger on the brella pressed as quickly as possible as I make my way over to the docks, looking out for any salmonids. None come by the time the minute is up, and I get a signal from Ivy, over at the left of me.

Hopping onto the grindrail, I shift into squid form quickly, hopping off and swimming towards the signal, where Ivy’s fighting off a horde of salmonids with a Squiffer. Shifting back, I open the brella and start shooting, using the umbrella as a shield as I fire at the Steelhead, waiting for it to try to bomb us. 

Ivy’s got a shot lined up already, and as soon as the salmonid tries anything, it’s dead, exploded into three golden eggs. I take one, as does Ivy and Eight, who just arrived. Four comes in quickly with a dynamo- lucky- and begins taking care of the horde with a practiced manner as the three of us retreat to stash the eggs in the basket.

And that’s how it goes the first round. We’re working surprisingly well together, Ivy sniping a ton of what we can’t brute force. Four takes care of the hordes, and Eight and I take care of everything else.

And then we have to swap weapons. It’s incredible- the weapon in my hands basically morphs itself into another. It’s made of ink, so it makes sense, but still fascinating to watch.

This time, I’m stuck with the Squiffer, Eight’s got the dynamo (and looks hot as hell, like she clearly knows what she’s doing with it and-) Ivy’s got my old Brella, and Four’s left with the slosher.

We go our separate ways, painting the pathways back with the dull purple ink we were assigned.

\--

We drag ourselves back to the boat after a long shift. It went fine, thankfully- basically everyone went down in the third wave, but we’re fine. Mostly.

“Please remind me to never let Four plan these things again.” Eight mumbles as she drags herself to a changing room to get black into her normal clothes. I nod in agreement, this was something of a living hell. Once we get back home, I am absolutely watching a shitty movie and then sleeping.

“Never let Ava do this again!” Ivy says, and I raise a fist in agreement.

_ “Never let Four do this again!”  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh remember to comment or i'll come up with some strange threat for next time dude it's 4:30am and i cant think of things-  
>  \- clara's team Can And Will Come Back for ~reasons~  
>  \- so yknow that "i fight my ex gf in a denny's parking lot" video? dyou thing three and eight would just randomly duel in a parking lot? like, is that just me who thinks they'd do that?  
>  \- on that same note i guess im fighting my ex gf in a denny's parking lot? but we don't have dennys around here? so i think we'll have to settle for a hardware store parking lot?  
>  \- would you all be interested in me doodling out scenes for like, every chapter? nothing fancy, just like the one in the top notes, just like. that?   
>  \- go take care of yourself! drink water, make your bed, change into clothing, take care of yourself!!


	6. sanitized | 3 pov

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nightmares and hurt/comfort, my favorite.  
> hey, now yall get to see what it was like for 3 in Kamabo! and my interpretation of sanitization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♪ my sleep schedule is so fucked~ ♪
> 
> weekly art [splatoon 2: unofficial Octo Expansion poster] [Here!!](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/713180839248265306/801430235983773696/splat2OEposter.png?width=575&height=676)

I stand, heroshot in hand, facing a foe. I don’t know them- don’t see their face- but I know they have to be defeated if I’m to live. I tense my shoulders, preparing to spring into action as soon as the figure was to move.

It does, and I flip out of the way of the ink suddenly painting the ground, and as soon as I’m down I’m pulling the trigger of the gun, shooting at the figure as we dart around each other, a bomb tossed occasionally as we circle each other.

As I leap at the figure, I feel a sudden pain on the back of my head and I cry out in pain, darkness overtaking my vision for a moment before it’s a flaring light and the feeling of falling.

I feel myself open my eyes, see a darkness below me that I know is ominous- that will hurt me. But I can;’t stop falling, so I close my eyes and brace for impact against the ground.

\--

I’m being dragged. I feel the cuff of my cape being pulled along by something, and my head is throbbing like hell itself. I pry an eye open, and all I see is the tunnels and winding halls I don’t know, but so much dread comes over me as I weakly struggle against my captor.

A laugh from the green-skinned octoling holding me, another octoling next to me carrying a seemingly-normal octoling, who seems to be struggling like I am.

Before long, I’m thrown into a room, one of those weird green octolings facing away from me and Normal Octoling.

**“These are the intruders deemed unworthy as subjects?”** The octoling turns, flicking a headphone ear off of one ear. She seems to be some important member in this facility, and by Cod I want to get up and fight back, but the green Octolings are making that a challenge.

**“Yes, Acting Commander Dedf1sh.”** One of the octolings replies. They- and this Dedf1sh- have a static to their voice as they speak, almost like a broken phone.

“Take the octoling. Sanitize them. The inkling- toss them in a chamber, see how they do.” Dedfish says to the soldiers, and I’m picked up, taken from the room.

I’m tossed into a room, given my heroshot and an inktank- strange in how it looks and feels. Too heavy, I think, but right now that’s not my concern.

\--

I test for Cod-knows how many weeks. Months. Until finally, I escape. Hy heroshot helps me get to a distress signal on the CQ-80, and crashing through the floor, I see the Cap’n and an octoling, and feel the impact against my leg before I’m knocked out.

I feel the goop dig its way into my skull, the ink making itself at home in my skin, the goo like fire against my skin, and like knives as it winds into my skin. I want to cry out in pain as I feel my eye open- see the ground, see the blood dripping out onto my hands, onto the floor.

I don’t remember much. I tie the Cap’n up as I make my way to the elevator. Standing there, feeling the ink dig its way deeper into my brain, pushing through my veins like acid, I want to die. I know with a certainty that right now, I am the threat I promised to eradicate.

A jagged pain spikes through my right eye as the sanitised goop digs its way deeper into my skin. More blood drips out and I cry out in pain, now finally deemed good enough- corrupted enough- to be able to move.

Falling to my knees, I try to claw at the goo, but to no avail. My hand rakes through it, but it just moves back, leaving me useless.

With a sudden spike of pain, I stand, facing away from the elevator as the octoling from earlier ascends. She seems to be talking to some people in Inkish, but then the chatter cuts off as the elevator stops.

The parasitic ink digs its claws deeper into my flesh, as if securing its grip as I turn with an unnatural smile. This thing is an enemy, I can tell. It must be eradicated. It cannot be allowed to ascend to the surface- what if more of its kind decide to come and threaten my home?

No. This ends now, with me. I will kill this thing for good, or die trying.

**“So. You’ve ascended this far.”** I speak with a scratchy, hoarse voice, static tinting the edges.  **“You scum think it is acceptable to try to invade my home. That your kind deserve any more than death. That** **_I_ ** **will allow you to pass.”**

I feel myself jump, but then lean into it, the will forcing me to move finally gone as I summon a Splashdown where the octoling was standing.  **“No, no. You were forced underground for a reason. Your kind are too abysmal to look at, not even the gods above wanted to be able to see your pathetic faces.”**

I duck under a bit of ink as I feel the burn of a special ready to be activated. Without a thought, I do so, a curling bomb launcher in hand. I begin tossing the bombs before feeling the usual burn of ink covering me, and instinctively superjump away, waiting a moment before moving.

**“You honestly think you’ll be able to beat Agent Three?”** I laugh, a cold sound with static breaking through before jumping down, another Splashdown crashing to the ground before a Baller, me charging the octoling, exploding the baller as soon as we’re close.

I recognise her, suddenly. I know her. Eight. Why in the fuck-

**“Scum like you deserves nothing better than death. As soon as you’re blended into what I need, this useless inkling is after you.”** The crackling-static is stronger than ever as I try to resist the goo, but nothing.

Eight, between my shots, takes me down again, leaving me to use the Stingray- and have her chuck bombs at me. In a final act of desperation for this host, I feel so many specials coursing through my veins and it  _ burns help please it hurts please stop stop stop- _

\--

Yep. I didn’t think I’d get sleep tonight. With a shaky grumble, I throw myself out of bed and consider going to get Eight. But- nah. She shouldn’t have to deal with my bullshit, she got to see me break down and quite honestly, I don’t want to do that again.

_ But why these goddamn nightmares every fucking night? I want a  _ **_break_ ** _ \- one day is all I fucking ask.  _ I think to myself as I walk downstairs to make myself something for breakfast, since I guess I’m waking up at six today.

“Oh! Three! You are awake.” I hear the voice before I register who it’s coming from.

_ “Hi, Eight.”  _ I sign, going to the kitchen to make myself a bowl of cereal or something.

“Are you okay?” Eight asks. “Usually, you do not get up this early unless… did you stay up all night? Again?”

_ “No.”  _ I pour the cereal into the bowl before adding a bit of milk and getting a spoon.  _ “Goddamn- can’t get five minutes of peace in my head.”  _

I sit down on the couch with my bowl, turning the TV on and pulling up  _ Letters to Satan Claus _ . Pressing play, I watch as the title screen rolls and Eight sits down next to me.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

I shake my head.  _ Nope, no-sir-re, those great memories are going to stay in my head, thank you very much.  _ Taking a bite of the cereal, I make a grumble-ish noise, in case I hadn’t gotten the point across.

“Can I stay out here with you?” The question comes after a minute. I know she cares- still hard to convince myself, sometimes- but I just. Don’t want to talk about my past.

_ “No questions and sure.” _ I respond.

“Fine.” Eight says. “I’m going to get a blanket, you look like you’re freezing.”

I don’t deny it, and give Eight a smile as I place the bowl on the counter for Future Three to deal with, instead curling up with the blanket.

“No sharing?” Eight gives an amused smile at me, and I roll my eyes a bit, now slightly less grumpy. I nod, extending an arm under the blanket, which Eight proceeds to wrap herself in (and I totally don’t want to be near her, nope, never, me, nah).

“...Three, are you okay?” Eight asks me. I take a second to consider why she’s asking me this before noticing I am literally leaning against her. Whoops.

_ “Fine.” _ I reply, not moving. Touch is good, it is comforting, it reminds me I’m not still asleep in that nightmare.

“Three, I- do you want a hug?”

_ Yes. Say yes, you can say yes, you really do, why is it so hard for you to admit- _

I shrug. Of course, Eight interprets this as a yes and proceeds to wrap her arms around me, in a comforting manner. I most certainly don’t basically melt into that, nope, I’m Agent Three, I don’t need this.

But it sure is nice when I do have it.

I, with an amount of uncertainty, hug her back, smiling gently. It’s so amazing to have someone like this who really cares- more than I can say about my family. If this happened with them, Eli would have just teased me. 

But Eight? Callie and Marie? Four? They call care- even if not all of them admit it.

Maybe this’ll all be fine.

But still, some part of me is too scared it won’t be.

It’s never ended well before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment or the demon under your bed will comment in your name and you will only be able to speak in rhyme for a month [yes, this is my 10/10 "please comment" for the week]  
> \- yay angst  
> \- sorry it's another hurt/comfort, i just. it's 4am and i needed a chapter and this was what came to mind + was fun  
> \- i have an idea for next week, don't you worry  
> \- have any of yall played celeste?? so good, super relatable (as an anxious + depressed + trans person), lena raine is a god at music, listen to the ost- it's a favour  
> \- ooooo another character introduced!! sorta!! idk man, i may use 07 somewhere


	7. six | Ivy pov

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Octavio waits for no man (or woman, or squid, or kid)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> screech i am sorry this was up so late, it has been a Hell Of A Week

**■Webmaster■ > Agent 4 has joined the chatroom**

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Three is there a reason Ocatvo isn't in his snowglobe

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** what

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** Are you out fighting Octavo rn

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** uh

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** no?

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** and eights here

**Agent 3 [they/them] > ** so

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** FUCK

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** THREE THAT MEANS HES LOOSE

**Ivy [she/her] > ** dudes what the fuck is going on are yall okay?

**Agent 4 [she/her] > ** FUCK WRONG GC DW ABOUT IT

**■Webmaster■ > Ivy has left the chatroom**

**_Ivy [she/her]_ ** _ to _ **_Agent 8 [she/they]_ **

**Ivy [she/her] > ** yo eight why are three and ava yelling at each other about uhhh

**Ivy [she/her] > ** “ocatavo”?

**Agent 8 [she/they] > ** Do not worry about it! Though we may have to reschedule today’s matches.

\--

Hm. At the edges of my memory, the name Octavo reminds me of something from school, when I was a little squid. The general of the evil octarians who threatened to kill all inkling-kind and rule over with an iron, tyrant’s fist. The inklings had beat them in the Great Turf War, and now they were condemned to a life beneath the surface, where they plotted against the inklings.

Of course, some inklings said they had seen octatians since then, but really? I think they’d know if they saw tentacles with legs, which is what the textbooks told us they looked like.

I roll my eyes and toss my phone at the couch before getting ready for the day. Walking to my room, I throw on my clothes- and with some reluctance, a jacket. It’s cold out there, and sadly my shirt won’t cut it. With a hurried motion, I grab my E-liter and sling it over my shoulder, thankful for the strap they add to the newer models.

Plopping my phone in a pocket and tossing my tentacles over my shoulder, I head out into Inkopolis proper. I figure that I may as well get some practice in, if the rest of the team is bailing on me for Cod-knows what reason.

Why they were talking about some “Octavo” and a snowglobe is beyond me- hell, for all I know, they found the general of the octarians and threw him into one. Wouldn’t that be a turn of events.

I begin trudging through the snow to Deca Tower, surprised by the darkness around me. The usually bright city is surprisingly dim and dark, lit only by the early-morning sun. Few others are out at this time- I do note some of the inklings who joined us on Salmon Run with the team- Masque and Ro.

I turn away from them and begin walking to the tower, now determined to get there before the crowds arrive and I’ll have to wait half an hour for a single Turf match.

It’s a nice day, so far. Light snow falls from the sky, but it’s still clear enough to not require anything else for me to see. But it’s still eerie, the silence and the darkness.

Arriving at the square, it’s a crowd of people. My fins press down a bit in annoyance as I try to see why everyone’s so bunched up here. Mutterings surround me as I push my way through the crowd to the tower, finally seeing the issue.

The Great Zapfish is gone.

...again.

_ Great.  _ I think, rolling my eyes.  _ Now I can’t do shit. _

As I turn away, I catch a glimpse of a figure I recognise. Three, standing with Ava and Eight around a manhole with a grate. The orange inkling seems to be signing something in exasperation before turning to squid form and shifting through, figuring everyone’s too invested in listening to Off The Hook talk to see.

Eight and Ava follow the orange squid, leaving me with a choice. See what’s happening, or go home and do nothing.

Resigned to my fate of being eternally curious if I don’t follow, I begin shoving my way past the crowd and eye the grate with a distrustful look. I have no idea what it is, or what’s down there, but I may as well go. After all, the rest of the team is there, and Ava’s always talking about how we need to “be there for each other” and “work with the team”.

Tossing a glance around, I shift into squid form, letting myself fall through the cover, and expect to fall to concrete. No- instead, I’m pulled along at a bajillion miles an hour, it feels like, until I’m tossed out the other side, my body instinctively shifting back to human form as soon as I’m through the grate.

\--

My vision spins as I look around at a platform, lightly coated in snow, with Three, Ava, and Eight, as well as another inkling standing by the edge. Or, rather they were. Now, they’re all coming over to me, with the grey inkling- Marie from the Squid Sisters????- saying something to Three.

“Who is this? And why are they here?”

Three glares down at me.  _ “Ivy. Why in all of hell are you here.” _

Before answering, I sit up and take a second to have the dizziness calm down. Once my head stops spinning, I push myself off the ground and stand uncertainty. “I saw you three going down here, and Ava’s always going on about teamwork, so I figured-”

“What’s the plan with her, Marie?” Ava cuts me off, turning to the grey inkling- so it is Marie!! From the Squid Sisters!!! That’s so cool!! But I have the weirdest feeling that knowing who she is wouldn’t help.

Marie huffs and turns away. “She can stay. Not like it’d do us any good to have her gone, and you all’ve worked with her before- or at least, we can assume as such, based on your reactions.”

Turning back to me, the shorter, grey-haired inkling looks me over. “Charger, are you?” I nod, pulling a bit on the strap connecting to my E-liter.

“Great. You’ll be Agent 6 of the New Squidbeak Splatoon. We’re calling you Six.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah.  
> \- comment or the demon below your bed will be sad. and you dont want that! who would want to make their demon roommate sad???  
> \- for the record, i dont plan out how this goes, so this is legit the original direction of the fic  
> \- PogU

**Author's Note:**

> fdjkfsjgnf yep.  
> \- three's been nonbinary for 3 years and couldn't be happier. they identify as a lesbian, sexuality-wise, and are afab (hence the f/f tagging, easier to explain idk man)  
> \- ivy's a mtf trans squiddo. not sure her sexuality but it aint straight  
> \- this takes place like. a yearish after the metro. three and eight are 17 and four's 15. ivy's 16ish. and yes i know four is young but like. when isn't agent 4 a child  
> \- everyone in universe sort of knows that three and eight bicker like a married couple and are wondering when they'll finally realize they have feelings for each other  
> \- ivy is based off a vampire squid, so she's not quite inkling or octoling. three's a humboldt squid, four's a colossal squid, and eight's a mimic octopus  
> \- hey you! yes, you! drink water! go on a walk! make yourself a nice lunch! take care of yourself! you're a wonderful person!!  
> \- leave a comment or a kudos? i love reading comments, they make my day. if you have suggestions or anything, leave them! i may include them!


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